Becca's hair styling guru and founder of the La Jolla-based Belle Sirène Salon and Sherri Belanger drives up to Los Angeles to answer all your hair questions! For a list of all the products mentioned on this episode, visit www.theladygang.com Follow the podcast on Instagram @theladygang and you can email Jac, Becca and Keltie at HelloLadyGang@gmail.com.
Perhaps you know what we need to do this holiday season, what go bananas? With exercise stemming from our Peloton bikes, there's so much fun. I love doing it. It is so much fun and we can spend our hard earned money on our bikes and we can go bananas. What's so great about Peloton is you can unleash the real you, the real pumps you want to try climb a hit, a low impact ride cla*s. You can you can hop off the bike and pivot the screen to do a bar strength or yoga cla*s. And I know you really love that bar cla*s. I do love the bar. It is an entertainment mashup that will have you singing at the top of your lungs like a maniac, sweating and moving around without judgment. Peloton takes the work out of workout. You'll find classes and instructors that will keep you coming back for more. And when you love your workout, what happens? Perhaps you stick with it. Just stick with it for Peloton's December offer. Head to one Peloton.com/ deals all access membership. Separate terms apply. So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready one, two, three. Oh, I mean, just the clap to end all collapse. I mean, it's you know, what's so pitiful about us is we could sit here for about five to ten minutes each Tuesday and Thursday and talk about your clap and how good it was or how piss poor it was. Yeah, with the same and through spasm and like, Oh, it's going to be a great episode because the clap was get or this is going to suck because the clap was bad. Like, we believe in it totally. We believe in it and our listeners believe in it. However, there are a few. There are a few skunks at the garden party that are dismissive of your clap and the importance of it in launching each and every episode right? They minimize reliability. All we're trying to do is help everybody. This is when it starts, it starts with the clap. Here we go. We're knocking it out. Start with a great big clap. I recommend when you wake up in the morning, even if your partner specifically, if your partner's still asleep, just got yourself one to three clap. Yeah. And then just launch the day, launch the day. See how that works out. Yeah, tell it. Probably not great if I'm guessing. What have you had it with? Okay, what I've had with I know it always goes back to cars, but this really grinds my gears. We were just recently in a city that was all one way had no parking. The f**king parallel parkers that cannot parallel park. What is? Is it one try? Is it to try? At what point do you realize you're blocking traffic? And it's never going to f**king happen. You can't parallel park. And so I think too, I think if you can't get it after two, you have to be done. But I am a great parallel, Parker. So maybe I'm just ridiculously overly sensitive to people that cannot because as you watch someone, you know, they're not going to be able to do it and they can like. I think the most we had was like five tries. So I've had it with people that can't parallel park and then continue to make the same mistake every time. So I'm wondering from you, what do you think? Is it two shots? Is it three shots? How many shots do you get two and done two and done? I agree. I think two, if you can't get it by two, you're then find somewhere else two and done. You get two tries. Yeah. And by the second try, if you've not been able to execute the parallel park, you have to proceed right now. If there's nobody anywhere around and you're not blocking swing for the fences, go 25000 tries. But let me ask you this are you a better clapper or parallel Parker? Boy, that's a tough one, I would have to say. I mean, I'm a really good parallel. Parker, just because of the courthouse, you've always had to parallel park. So I've had a lot of practice, probably have more practice, parallel parking. I don't know. I mean, maybe I'm a better parallel Parker than I am a clapper. Gotcha. Okay. All right. Let me tell you what I've had it with. Lay it on me. I've had it with coded language. Okay. And let me give you an example of this. Like the phrase traditional family values. Oh, gross. Yes, my problem is with the word traditional, right? OK. First and foremost, that is when people use that phrase, we're a traditional family, what they're trying to do and using that is further marginalize marginalized people agree like gay people. Right? And here's what people need to know. Most gay people, by virtue of stats, came from what quote unquote would be considered a traditional family, which is a man woman, right? Produced child. Right? You know, now we have gays and lesbians that are couples that are adopting and or doing surrogacy. And that would be considered. To these people, not to me, but to these people, nontraditional. But first of all, I have to say about this. Number one, everybody f**king supports family. It's not like anybody is outgoing. Yeah. My name is PAP's and I'm running for president and I oppose family. I hate everything about family. You know, just the fact when you have somebody bragging about something that is just universally accepted and they say this is a positive value that I hold, which is family or something like I support children, you know, it's like, well, no s**t, Sherlock, you know, that doesn't make you the smartest guy in the room. But using the word traditional family values, that s**t so pisses me off because it's like, OK. First of all, OK, let's take Mike Pence. Mike Pence, he's a big traditional family value guy. I think it's kind of f**ked up that he calls his wife mother. That's what I was just going to say. I mean, his traditional family values gag me out, calling her mother. It's weird. And I also when you hear traditional family values, my immediate thought is misogyny. They want women to be subservient. That is to they use the word traditional like ladies are younger listeners. If you're dating a guy right now. And he says to you, Well, I'm traditional, that's code for I'm a sexist misogynist, correct? That is just. And at first, you're in love. Pheromones riddled self might think, Oh, he wants to open the door for me. He wants to do these chivalrous, chivalrous like activities for me. But what it means is he wants you home, right? Not having financial independence, correct? And it's a red flag. No, I agree. And then as this goes into politics, you have people like Ted Cruz saying he's for traditional family values. I just want to remind the listener, and I think we need to bring this up at least two to three times annually on the anniversary of 911 a few years back. Ted Cruz, Mr Traditional family values man. Patriot galore, right? USA hard on out the wazoo. Right? Liked a tweet that was from a porn site. Right. Which is neither traditionally a family value style tweet. And one could argue, is somewhat anti-American to do that on the anniversary of 911. Yeah. And I mean, I'm not browbeaten people for watching porn, but he particularly should not be standing up there saying what a great Christian he is and how he has traditional family values and then scrolling around on a porn site. I mean, not just it's it's counterintuitive, but I mean, but is it? Are we surprised that Ted's, you know, into porn? No, no, I'm not. Now, the loudest, the loudest, most obnoxious people objecting to something are the biggest offenders. They're just trying to hide it. Listener, if you vote for somebody that says they're for traditional family values and then you voted for Trump twice. f**k off. Please do not listen to our podcast block caucus on all social media. Please don't even leave a very well thought out hate comment on our reviews. Yes, just go away. Go away. Welcome to I've had it where we are fighting traditional family values every step of the way. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. She is not in a traditional family. No, she's a divorcee. She's a d for saying she is a divorcee on the market for men or women. We were I personally am going to start accepting applications for review and read those to everybody unpatriotic. I think that would be so fun. Yeah, we were talking about it on the plane the other day. Wouldn't it be fun just to have like a burner dating website at profile so that you could see other people that, you know, are on there and see what they're saying and s**t? I mean, it'd be kind of funny. I just can't wait to make your profile, Judge Judy Diana. Yes, please. Patron saint of podcasting. Maybe I should get several bikini pics that I can add up there. Don't you think? Should I do my hanger check on their hanger trick? Yeah, hang that wire hanger off your titty. Yeah, I think that'd be great. I think that's more only fans. Oh, yeah, yeah. What do I always call it? What fans only be like? Kylie always corrects me and I'm like, I actually have a mental block to that. We'll be in a conversation and pops up like, Yeah, you know, they have like a fan only account, and Kylie kind of closes her eyes and she goes, only fans. Yeah. Kylie, what's going on with you? Not much. Are you sick of us? No, not at all. Oh, that's so nice. I bet that's a lie. It's not a lie. I mean, we're sick of us. So you have to be sick of us. Yeah. No. You guys are just such a delight. Aren't we just a real treat? Ah, I mean, just nothing but roses and lolly, just beacons of positivity. A lot of people disagree with that, though on the internet. They do. There's a lot of naysayers aren't there. There are. I've got some good hate comments for you. Okay, great. Okay. So we posted a video of U2 with Joshua Welch on the internet. OK? Someone commented. Collectively worn out veggies like these fossils pictured above smell like vodka and cigarettes. Scott, the gay friend, doesn't help the smell either, and that gay friend is Josh Welch. What was this on a video was on Twitter. Yeah, on Twitter, on a video of you two. And. I love that. That's a really good one. Yeah, that's a really, really great hate comment. The worn out veggies and the gay man. That should be our tagline. We should change the name of the podcast. This man wrote, I can smell the feminism from this podcast. And then someone commented, and it smells like boxed wine and cat litter. So first of all, in his world, feminism is a bad word. It's a bad descriptor, right? Sounds like if you're a feminist, you're just a real dick, right? In his world. So my comment to that would be s go away. Go f**k yourself. Yeah, go f**k yourself. You know, here's something. I found that we're doing this at the age that we're in, right is society as a whole only really values. Women are sees their opinion dimmable during their birthing years. And then when you get to be our age, were very dismissed, were very dismissed. Group of women in general, it's like, Oh, everything and everything is surrounding our age or our vaginas. It's a very ajuste sexist age that we're in a listen. We have thick skin. I can take it, but I think it's a larger question. When men hit their fifties, this conversation doesn't really happen. Nobody's like running around, you know, saying limp dick. I mean, pops and I are, to be fair, other than other than us, but we're really petty. But it's women that are our age, whether it's other women, our age or younger. It's like women are so only valued during their birthing years. And then once that they're just literally sent out to the pasture and you see that echoed through every single platform that we're on YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, all of them. It's a very we're very dismissed because of our age, right? We're past our prime, as they say. Yeah, yeah, which I'm so much smarter now than I was when I was younger. Isn't not the truth. I mean, if I had this much life experience and wisdom that I have now at 25, I might have like. Done something with your life, done something with my life, like curing cancer or something, probably not cure cancer because I can't do math that well, but I would have done something more productive. I would have definitely made better choices. But the one resounding link between all the hate comments is ageism. Yeah, and it particularly is more targeted towards women. Now, listen again. I'm not moaning about this. We voluntarily put ourselves on the internet. This is a volunteer position. We open ourselves up to all sorts of criticism by doing this, and we're not victims of that right. We actually get tickled by it. But I think it's really funny that that they immediately the immediate thing is your shriveled up visions. I mean, that's the in. They think that that like hurts us, right? Which it doesn't. But it's like, that is something I think an interesting conversation to have in another episode about how women are really boxed into these are the years that you're valuable. And then after that, get the f**k out of here. Everything you say is irrelevant. Your vagina is irrelevant. Get the f**k out. And that's the common link when you say Kylie. Yeah, Hag is like the main word I see. Yeah, bitter old hag. Yeah, but IRL Cow was one of my face. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah, yeah. And it's always dried up revealed. They also assume you don't have kids so that you're miserable. Right? It's a whole nother, right? Like, you have to have kids to be fulfilled in life, right? Which at church we do have kids. We're just not the type of moms that sit around and talk about our kids nonstop because it's more fun to rail on the moms that do that than be the mom that does that. And kids stories are generally boring, horrifically boring, breathtakingly boring to hear about somebody else's kid. Right? Nobody cares. Nobody f**king cares. Nobody but you. We're doing a public service by not talking about our children. That's right. I can't imagine if I had to sit here and listen to you, tell children stories every day. I would've left a long time ago. I wouldn't have made it. No, I think the podcast what? It tanked. Yeah, immediately. Immediately. Nobody f**king wants to hear that. I do like your dog stories, though. Yeah. See, I could live without the dog stories, too. Yeah. You know, one thing I was thinking about a lot lately, recently. And Kylie will understand that you won't. But oftentimes, you know you're at a divorce attorney, so I want your input on this. Oftentimes, we're always concerned about how divorce impacts the child. Right? And I've been thinking a lot lately about how divorce impacts dogs. Oh my god, it's real. I wish you would not have told me that. But think about it like I see Chhichhore and Tabby, and they have their own special relationship with me. And then they have their own special relationship with Josh. And if one of us was gone, you know, they're they have grief and they could have issues relating to that. And so have you ever had in your divorce career as a divorce attorney like dog visitation schedules? Or does anybody care about this? Is anybody advocate for the animal? OK, I have one story about that I might have heard, he told it on the podcast, but it's worthy of telling again. So when I was just a baby lawyer, we had an older couple, probably our age ish now. Mm-Hmm. They only had two golden retrievers. They didn't have kids. So when they got divorced, they were fighting over seeing the dogs. So we did a schedule week on, week off like they were with dad, a week they were with mom. A week alternated equal time for the people. So the hateful mean awful spouse soon to be ex spouse of my client. When it was her week, she took them to the vet and had them put down. Told me this before and I blocked it, euthanized them to punish him. So that's incredibly factors that. Shouldn't that be a crime? It wasn't at the time, I don't think it's a crime to have your dogs put to sleep. I think it should total because the court we had an agreement to the visitation schedule, but the court doesn't have a court order with visitation. I think she should be in the penitentiary and to the death penalty anyway. So we have people have fought over dogs, but ultimately it ends up becoming a bigger hassle like the parties have to see each other when they exchange the animals. I would fight to the bitter end to make sure that I had equal visitation with my dogs. Right? I mean, that would be something that I would leave money on the table because I value and care about their health and well-being, and I just don't think this topic is discussed very often. What happens to the dog in divorce? Well, I think that's because there are a lot of other issues more pressing when you're getting a divorce than how the dogs feel, which is why I think this needs to be discussed. Yeah, but I would say out of 100 problems that you have going through a divorce, even if the dog is the most beloved person in the family, it's probably 101. Kylie, how would you feel if you and Anna broke up and about Judy's well-being? It'd be a really big issue. Exactly right. I get why people stay together for the kids. Right? You know, some people might stay together for the dogs. Yeah. I just looked up online and there are a lot of articles of how divorce affects dogs and the side effects that come with it depression, anxiety, bad behavior, anger. I think we need to do an entire episode about this not only to highlight the struggle of the dog during divorce, but also to torture, perhaps for a solid 45 to 55 minutes. Yeah, I was just going to say during that episode, Can I just like stick needles in my eyes or like, stab myself in the kidney with a butter knife? Absolutely not. You have to willingly and enthusiastically participate, and you will be our legal expert on the panel when we roll out this episode. But the point you're missing is that the judge does it. The court doesn't have any jurisdiction over a pet. OK, here's the deal. All right. I. The court might not have any jurisdiction over the pet, but our hearts have jurisdiction over the pet. And we, as people that love animals more than we love human beings, Kylie and me and a lot of our listeners want to explore this often neglected topic. I mean, I wonder if there's even a podcast episode out there about this. There's going to be there's this is going to be, Oh God, please let me is going to change the game and podcasting Judge Judy, Diane, Judge Judy, Diana, permanent record entry number one, perhaps is not a good pet owner. We should do like a Jerry Springer moment where we bring scout out at the end. Oh God, that would be sad. I don't want him that close to me. I'm afraid he'll go home with me. That would be so good. Any more hate comments? Someone with the name somewhat obese, platypus wrote. The amount of war paint and hair dye is almost too much to digest. I think he's making fun of our makeup and hair. I will say that it does take like jet fuel to get our hair this blonde. So. Oh yeah. I mean, I think we resemble that and we'll take that in stride. All right, listener. Listen up. We have as a guest today in studio, a former sorority sister. I guess it's not former. I guess it's forever. It's forever. As sorority sister of Pam says from the Kappa House at the University of Oklahoma. Like Pam, pansies like most prized accomplishment of her life as having been a kappa at the University of Oklahoma, and her sorority sister, who now lives in L.A. and owns a very popular makeup brand. And she's visiting friends and family in Oklahoma, and we have her in studio. Let's get Pam's sorority sister, Nicole Greco in here. Perhaps let's talk about microdosing. You know that just right feeling when your body and mind are really at peace. Like after a nice workout or a nice long shower where you're relaxed, focused and a little energized being in the zone? Well, microdosing can help you get into that zone easier and stay there for longer. Microdosing helps relieve anxiety, pain or muscle tension. It helps boost the mood, relaxation and living in the moment, spicing up sex and intimacy. Falling asleep and staying asleep. Exercise post-workout recovery. And it also assists and focus and creativity. Listener to learn more about microdosing THC, go to microdosing dot com and use the code habit to get free shipping and 30 percent off your first order. Again, that's microdosing dot com code. Had it, microdosing dot com code had it for 30 percent off. 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OK, Nick Cayo, Greco sorority sister of Pops, I mean, that in and of itself could be an entire podcast, 100 percent. She kept saying former and I was like, No, it's not for me. It's not forever. Yes. She kept sponsors in the bar, and that's her forever. For the layman, for a lot of our listeners, probably are not in Greek culture. Yeah, it seems silly not to diminish the your sisterhood, but I think you kind of are. Once college is over that, then it would be a former. But y'all consider, are we? We cement the bond. That's right. OK? When we're young. Yeah, I met pumps when I was 18. Yup, yup. She was our pledge trainer, which meant she taught us our group, our pledge cla*s. How'd she do? She's really good. She taught us how to be kappa ladies. You know, all the manners, the behavior at parties, right? You know, she really laid the groundwork for the, you know, ultimate women. We became really laughing. Let me ask you this. So you're telling me that she trained you on how to be a lady and to behave at parties? Yes. During that era, did you ever see her not behaving at parties and not acting like a lady? I mean, I think we just looked up to her so much that we took every example to her. Right, so. So, you know, when pump's was like, You girls need to get it together. It was grades. It was manners behavior. Don't let your dates get too drunk on the bus, you know that type of thing. But when we saw perhaps having a good time, we knew that we would grow in to the fun vibe. You have no idea how happy I am. This makes me because you're so incredulous about it. Well, I just. Listener. Here's just the thing I have to tell you that just it shocks me to my core part from the time that her daughter was a baby. And now she is a kappa, perhaps number one goal for her child. Yes, was for the child to be a member of the Kappa Kappa gamma sorority. Yes. And I just don't relate to that. I just I think there's a fear of possibly peaking too soon. And what if your child wants to be involved in something more nuanced and intellectual or what have you? I just I I don't relate to this on so many levels and furthermore perhaps brought to my office at one point her sorority pin. I have mine in my bag. She brought the pen and sat down with me and a girl that worked for me to review Emily, her daughter's resumé, and at the time, Emily was in ninth grade in high school. But the the high school years are what's important on your. They don't care before eighth grade. Right. And I just I thought it was a little silly. You're acting like you can't be both intellectual. And by the we were like one in grades. Yeah, at at oh you and kappa. We were always like number one. Number two in grades. Yeah. Ian Kaihao just got the national kappa cap gamma person of the Year award, like two years ago. Yeah, at our national convention. Yeah, I'd never been to the National Convention before, but it was quite the honor. And, you know, it was such an interesting experience for me. Overall, I wasn't actually planning on going to AEW. I thought I was going to go away. I grew up in Norman. You know, my parents were really encouraging me to, you know, fly go see other parts of the world. And it wasn't until pretty much the last minute I decided not to go to Syracuse, right, and to go to 0U. And so I had to sort of rush to get into the rush game, right? And you know, now when I look back in retrospect, you know, I just wanted to be in one of the houses that all my high school girlfriends that were older than me were in. But, you know, and being a black female right time, I mean, carpet Udoji has gotten definitely more diverse since then. I was the first Black Kappa Kappa Gammon, right you. But in my head, I thought like, Oh, I'm just going to go hang out with my friends. And I wasn't even really thinking about that aspect. But now it makes me really proud when I think about that, when I think about how far we've come as a society with race. Mm hmm. From the early 90s to now, we've come a long way because I grew up in the white suburbs of Oklahoma City. Mm hmm. And racism at the time, I didn't really know that it was certainly racism in the manner that I know it now. Mm hmm. But it was kind of cooked into the culture and cooked into the books. And when I, as a progressive liberal, think about sororities and fraternities, I think a. Little bit, my mind thinks a little bit white supremacy, right? White supremacist organizations, so that is incredible in that not early 90s, 1991 yet in any word that you, you know, did you experience racism throughout that process? It was really interesting because I grew up in Norman, which is a university town, you know where the University of Oklahoma is and, you know, had a very happy childhood. My neighborhood was actually more diverse because it's where a lot of professors that were recruited. I was born in New York and my parents taught on the East Coast, and then my dad started the African Studies Program at Oklahoma. So that's why I moved here when I was almost nine years old. And I think my first sort of experience of, Oh wow, there's this undercurrent of what's not right really happened to me when I was a junior and for the first time I was going to school with. I mean, I think I'd only gone to school with two or three black kids on the west side. Right? Most of whom I was related to that, you know, all of a sudden now I was in this much more diverse culture and in our high school years. And then when I got to oak, you went through rush. It was, you know, everybody was very kind. A lot of people sort of questioned why I was going through predominantly white rush. Honestly, for me, and maybe it's just naivete. Maybe it's being a first generation American. I was sort of raised to be so proud of my race and my culture, but never to separate myself out from everyone else. Right? And so I, yeah, I got a lot of flak from from definitely a lot of the black sororities who sort of saw me as this kind of sellout for going. But then also, you know, a lot of small town, Oklahoma's small town, Texas, people who just didn't get it had a problem with it. But I think, you know, since I was really young, I've, you know, I am a recovering people pleaser, but I definitely feel like when I was young, I just sort of stuck to my own authenticity, even in the exploration of figuring out exactly who that was. And so while I cared and I would get my feelings hurt, I also sort of just chalked it up to like. They just, you know, I can't teach people how to treat me. I just have to show by example. That's awesome. OK, before we get into what with what you've had it with? Yeah. I want the listener to know. Since you left Norm Norman graduated from the University of Oklahoma, you are now the CEO and founder of an incredibly successful makeup brand that is available at all. J.C. Penney, correct? Yeah. So I'm a I'm a retailer now. I mean, I was a skin care founder. And then in 2020, in the midst of the global pandemic and a racial reckoning, I all of a sudden when those lists started coming out of like top black owned shop and to follow, I was at the top of those lists. It just kept happening, kept happening. And then I would discover on a list of like 500 black owned brands to shop that two things were happening. One, I was getting a lot of DMs from people asking if they could use, you know, for my previous brand, my face oil, because they weren't black, as if black and brown people. I'm like, Well, I'm pretty sure I use Remercier Powder, and I know she's not white, so it's cool. You can put it on your face and that white people are so excited. It's fascinating. And then B, I would see all of these brands on the list with me, and I'm like, Who? Who's this? What's this incredible brand? And then it went from like black owned to then black and brown owned to indigenous owned. And I started discovering all of these incredible brands created by people of color who make products for everyone that like no distribution. And so I say, that's when I sort of took my pain and I turned it into purpose and I was like, Well, guess what I'm going to do? I'm going to start a platform like a goop or violet grey. But 90 percent of all the brands that I carry are going to be created by these people, by myself. People of color who make products for everyone. But because I wasn't interested in resegregating the beauty aisle. I dedicated 10 percent to fostering Ally Ship. I had, with my previous brand, sold on Goop. And so Gwyneth Paltrow had kind of become, you know, a friend, a mentor. And so in starting the platform, she was really sort of mentoring me because of her success with Goop on how to do it, she became one of my first investors. And then we now to just over two and a half years later, carry 190 brands. I love it. I think it's great. I mean, I'm just sitting here looking at you going, Oh my God, she's so amazing. Oh, I mean, really? Well, you taught me to be this way. She did. You, can you? I wish I could take credit. But now she talks to you guys that don't smoke a cigarette and walk at the same day and you said, do not hold a drink while you're dancing on the dance floor. That was a big rule. She works two little rules to live by, which is funny because I've seen you walk and hold a cigarette somewhere to go. I know. Yeah, but it wasn't a party pick. It was ever in a party, never in a party pick. OK, so let's let's talk about what you've had it with. Oh, goodness, I mean, you know, this whole concept and it's beautiful of like women supporting women is something that you know, we're all fighting for, like the small slice of the pie. Like, I don't get it. One of the things that I've realized over the past, especially last three years, that in success, sometimes women don't like to see other people win. So I've really had it with women who like, claim like, I know women hate sports women and then really don't. I've really had it with like mean girls in their 40s and 50s. It's like, that's so not cool. It's not cool to ever be a mean girl, but it's it's really and like that judgment, right? It's like, we are. I mean, I just turned 50, and I was talking to one of my dear friends yesterday about what feels people keep asking, like what feels different at 50. And I think it's like the no BS factor in, you know, room totally toxic people. Right, right. And so as someone who always like like my girlfriends or my life, they are they are my chosen family. But like, I've had a few breakups. And yeah, and but it's been liberating. I have to let you in on a little secret. And I know our audience right now is probably thinking, who's going to tell you who's going to tell her? And pumps and I are kind of 50 year old mean girls. We get accused of being mean girls. I mean, I've I've read the comments I've seen with the trolls have to say, but when? Here's here's what I want to say about this. Mm-Hmm. The whole concept of mean girl culture is a myth. It is a complete myth, and it perpetuates sexism and further stereotypes. Women, right, that they are supposed to be nice and polite and so supportive of each other at the time. And Harvard did a study on this. Mm hmm. And if you think about your interactions with the last. Just 100 people, it's not bias towards women being meaner to you than it is men. It's split equally. And so I think as women, we need to move the conversation off of putting the pressure on women, right? For women to support women and women, not to be taking roles and women to do this and women do that. I have great f**king idea. What? How about the white guys that have been running the country forever? How about they do? Yeah, I like that. I stand by that. Let's take the let's take the pressure off of women, because here's my view the women supporting women thing. I think that it's dangerous and not sustainable or tenable as people navigate modern culture on social media to not get irritated at people. Mm hmm. When men get irritated at people and express a viewpoint about it? Hmm. Nobody thinks anything of it. But when a woman does it like pumps in me? Mm hmm. We're considered mean girls. Mm hmm. And actually, sometimes as a woman, you see other guys do stupid s**t that you think is stupid. And you call it out, especially if you're a loud mouth. Podcasters like pumps in me or you see women do a lot of stupid s**t. Yeah. And you call it out, right? I think over stereotyping and over analyzing and place all of this pressure on women, right, is bulls**t. And so I think as women take the f**king pressure off women, sometimes you want to be a b***h for the day. Yeah, f**k can be a b***h. Yeah. Yes. Men get to be dicks all the time. Right, right. Nobody calls them out. But when a woman has a strong opinion or maybe an unfavorable opinion to brand them or label them as a mean girl? I think it's kind of anti-woman because we get to be frustrated, right? As we get to be frustrated and we do get to be a b***h if we're having a day like we have permission to really be how authentically how we are. I think my point is when and I love what you said about men and really sort of reframing the concept of Mean Girl. I think what I'm referring to is when a human being tries to. Minimize come after, you know, for instance, I'll use an example that a woman, a person had said. And, you know, the success of 13 Loon and the opportunities that we've had that, well, those opportunities happened for her because she's black. Yeah. It's mean, but dismissive, dismissive. Definitely steeped in some racism. Totally racist, yeah. I mean, it's it's not steeped in racism that is racist. Yeah. And so overt racist, right? And so when I speak about these experiences that I've had with these people, sadly, some of them are. All of them are women. That being said, part of, you know, you've really opened my eyes because when I think about why especially other entrepreneur women that behave this way, why? It's because we're all fighting for this slice of the pie that in an industry that is really, truly supported by women to the tune of billions of dollars, right? But controlled by men. That's right. OK, we digress. And these are all very important things, but we want to play a game with you. All right. Love games, OK? It's called had it or hit it. Oh my god. Welcome to had it or hit it. I would hit it at it. I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. Had it or hit it. Power moms. Let me tell you what a power mom is. OK. Power mom is a Tomahawk chopper that circulates around the schools in mom group means PTA meetings about it. You know, it's so funny because I travel a lot for my job, and one of these power moms web is at back-to-school night, and it's really only women that ever say this to me to like, Oh my god, how did I saw your Instagram? How do you do it? Is it so hard on David that you travel so much? I'm like, I'm pretty sure nobody has ever asked me what David's out of town. Oh, honey, is it hard? Yes. With your husband out of town? Or she'll say, I mean, I don't. It's so good to see you here. Had it. Yeah, I've had it too. And we've been traveling a lot recently and I have people. How do you do it? How do you do it all? Well, I get up in the morning, I brush my teeth, I put my clothes on, I go to work. I travel to fabulous places to sleep in hotels, speak on conference, speak at conferences, have lunch with my friends and make money for my family. And then I go home, right? It's modern motherhood. Yeah, OK. Had it or hit it g r w m videos, which is I'll get ready with me, with me videos. So I'm in the beauty industry. So, you know, I don't. I mean, hit it. Yes, but this is a two parter. I'm really conflicted about how I feel with the get ready with me, but they're like talking about other things in life or the get ready with me that are like, almost shame you. If you're not doing it in a certain way, I like the creativity of a get ready with me where they're like, This is how you do a smoky eye, you know, educational videos. Gotcha. But like, do I really want to watch you put your makeup on and hear about like your day at school and how wasted you got last? Yeah, yeah. I think there's get ready with me abuse that's going on. There's a lot of abusers out there on the get ready, say I just launch cosmetics and my brand relevant. And so there will be coming soon. Some get ready with me, but I'm open your professional, but your profession, you're a professional. What's happening to your industry on the internet is a shame. Yeah, I had it or hit it. The word no as a complete sentence. You hit it the same. I love that the power of saying no, no. And sometimes you don't have to say anything beyond it. Just No, no, and that's something age gets you. Yes, where you can say no without having to explain why now? Because the answer that the explanation is not necessary, right? No. Thank you works, too. Yeah, yeah. Does keep it sweet if he does. But we have, as we establish a real mean girl reputation that we hold up. So we just stick with no, no, not today. I also like to use unsubscribe and that's a good yes, that's a good one. Okay. Had it or hid it, nude lipstick. Hit it. And I'll tell you why. Because had it would have been my answer a few years ago. But now there's amazing brands like We Carry a brand called Citizen Cosmetics, created by three sisters from Dubai and London, who created products where they everyone can find their nude lipstick and gloss and many other great products, too. So now I'm all about a new lip because I can find my nude. I wrote this thing probably on the internet for sure on the internet. Place that I read that it said that the nude your nude color of lipstick is the same color as your labia. What I thought that was pretty interesting that you have to go match your the color of your jeans. You just have to take it in the beauty counter to get ready to throw your ideal go commando and then take the little color. Turn with a little mirror and then figure out. Proper mandate and someone who has several beauty stores, if someone ever came in to me, right, that my labia color is this, do you have a gloss or I probably call security? Yeah, no kidding. You probably call the police, but I think that was your problem with the nude lipstick attempt. The other day. You didn't. I didn't match it with my lady. I need to pull that out and see what that would be. I mean, listen to each his own back their own. But I I've never heard that I had, but I'm for sure going to tell everybody. Oh, for sure. OK, last one had it or hit it. Oklahoma, well, hit it for the reasons that this is where I grew up, where I have so many people that I love, what I've had it with in Oklahoma is just an old paradigm. B.S. Yep. But I have hope for the great state and and I do believe that it's important for people who are more progressive thinkers to be to stay in this community, to be a part of this community, to be active in this community. I think having, you know, a great university like University of Oklahoma, you know, has really propelled the state forward. But yeah, we just got to have the right leaders in place and not we don't and we don't. That's the problem. All right. Q I cannot thank you enough for coming to be with your not former sister current current, but sister forever in perpetuity. Yes, that's right. Perpetuity. Forever. Yeah. Two. And shout out to all the. Lindsay Appel Ashley. The whole pledge cla*s. All of them. The new initiates that I came to. That's right. And she went to in Michigan on Saturday. Yeah. So I'm here to welcome in the new sisters. I'm so glad because I bet you, our listeners are chock full, a bunch of just, you know, sorority thumpers out there. Yeah. Yes. You're welcome. You're welcome. Now I will say, I kid you guys. I do think it's so sweet. I tell. Perhaps this her sorority sister friends are some of my favorite friends of hers, and the connection that you all have and how you stay in contact is precious darling. And I love it. I get tired of hearing about it. Wow. I think sometimes people make it into a much bigger deal than what it is. Wait till you can just say, Angie, start saving Kapurthala. Her daughter doesn't die all the time. She'll chase around singing kappa songs on vacation. I love it. OK, listen, I have listener. Go join us on Patria on the hot s**t to voice memos. Voice memos, Instagrams or Graham perhaps tell him and we'll see them. See you next Tuesday or Thursday or both. I've had it with Jared. I've had it with that.
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