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Stassi

Pour It Out: How To Keep Your Cool Around His Ex, Advice For Our Younger Selves & Our Favorite RomComs

Stassi's bestie Kristina Kelly joins her on this month's Pour It Out episode. The pair coach a listener on how to stay cool at a wedding where her boyfriend and his ex are both in the wedding party. They reminisce and give advice on fun 21st birthday celebrations in LA and they share the advice they'd give to their 24 year old selves. Kristina and Stassi talk about making friends in LA as an adult and end on listing their favorite romantic comedies.  If you want to be featured on a future episode of Pour It Out, call 844-666-SUWS and leave a voicemail! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Stassi
01:05:56 7/21/2017

Transcript

Straight Up with Stassie. Hi, everyone. I'm Stassie Schroeder. She's the star of Bravo's Vanderpump Rules. I'm here to talk about pop culture, reality TV, celeb gossip, relationships. Stassie's new podcast is Welcome, Khaleesi's. Welcome, you guys. Welcome to Straight Up With Stassie. Another week. Another effing week. You know what I mean? It's a grind. Life is a grind. Isn't life just a freaking grind? I had my first afternoon slash night off today in a really long a*s time. Like, I get Sundays and Mondays off, but Sundays are the only day that, like, in the week that both Patrick and I have off completely. So that day, like, I turn off my phone. I don't talk to anyone. I don't see anyone but him because that's, like, our only time to be around each other. So that that day doesn't count as, like, you know, time to myself. And then Mondays is the day when I go do, like, all my chores and, like, get things done. Like, spray tan, nails, pay some bills, the ones that aren't already just coming straight out of my account because I like things to be easy and convenient. Get my dogs groomed, clean my house, answer emails, whatevs. You know? Like, so it doesn't even feel like it's a real, like, day off because I'm, like, getting everything in that I would be getting in during the week if I didn't have to, like, work and stuff. And so last night, I was told that I only had to work till, like, 11:30 noon. And I was like, holy mother effing f. And I have one of my best friends from home who I grew up with from elementary school to high school to well, my 1st year of college when I went to LSU but, like, that was only, like, my first year and then I moved here. But and she's in town because, well, she went through a horrific breakup but she's in town and I texted her and I was like, oh my gosh. I have off. Come clean my closet. I want to introduce you to one of my best friends who I will know forever and ever. You know, a friend that like you know those friends that you grew up with that you can always be yourself with? It doesn't matter. It really doesn't f**king matter. That's this person, Alex motherf**king Stafford. Alright. So I'm just gonna say Hi, everybody. I'm gonna say it again because before I started this podcast, I was like, Alex, I'm gonna need you to speak up and I'm gonna need you to put the microphone to your mouth. And I, like, I gave her this whole speech about it and she was like, I get it. I know. I totally understand. I gotta speak up and, like, I need to be loud. And I'm like, no. Like, I know you say you get it but 90% of my guests say that they get it and then once I start recording, they don't get it. Then I have to tell them to speak up. So you just failed because you just went Hey, hey, everybody. Stafford. So just do me a favor. You're bringing me back to the good old days, Stas. Louder. You're bringing me back. Right? Taking me back in time when I would boss you around. Boss me around is an understatement. This is I miss this so much. I enjoyed it though. I miss people allowing me to boss them around. I know. This is the thing. You guys, I felt like this was a great opportunity to talk about how we were in high school and how we were growing up because so many people tweet me that and email me that. They're like, what were you like in high school? And now I have someone that actually spent every day with me. Yep. Prime witness here. Yes. Basically, her dad My dad. Her dad. Alex's dad said Poin the phrase. Stasi's posse. Oh, yes. I didn't mean that s**t up. For a little while, I thought that, like I'm like, did that actually happen? Was that actually a thing? Because we weren't, like, let's just talk about it. We weren't, like, cool in high school. Like, we went to an all girls Catholic school. We did. You were the coolest one in our group, I have to say. Well, no. Our group was, like, 5 people though of, like, people we grew up together so that doesn't really count. Like, we weren't, like, a real group. You know, like, all the lunch tables at our so this is how, like, groups were divided. We went to an all okay. Explain it. I'm just gonna give some backstory and chime in, Alex. Interrupt me if you want. Well, can we start with the brown checkered skirts? Sure. Do you wanna describe them in detail? They were brown checkered skirts and they went past our knees and we had to kneel for the nuns for them to measure them to see if they were okay. Otherwise, we'd get a demerit Demerit. If they were too short. That's right. So we had nasty a*s brown checkered skirts, white button downs, brown loafer y tie up shoes. This was all girls Catholic school. Honestly though To the tee. I kind of loved it because I didn't have to, like it it made me look forward to the weekend when I could put together outfits and I always accessorize. Like I had a flower in my hair. Some things never change. Well, you know, like I felt like I would I would decorate, like I would change my nail polish and get in trouble for that because we weren't supposed to have nail polish. I'd put on jewelry. No go. Makeup wasn't allowed but I would like kind of skirt around it. I'd be like I have eyeliner on the inside of my eye but you can't tell. Such a rebel. Such oh god. I was a loser. So okay. We had our group. We well, we started off going to an elementary school and we're friends with a lot of the people we went to elementary school with, boys and girls. And so it was a boys and girls Catholic. We had a great elementary school. We really did. Like Made some everlasting bonds. Yeah. You know Shannon and Chris have done my podcast before. They did it together when I was home for Christmas. I didn't know that. Yeah. You weren't I need to listen to your podcast, Mora. You're an a*****e. I know. You're an a*****e. I'm sorry. I still love you. I know. So we went to a coed elementary school and we're still best friends with most of the people there. But then Which is pretty rare. It is so rare. Like, when I tell people that It's not really special. It is. Like, I tell people that in LA and they're like, what? You're still friends with most of the people that you went to elementary school? It's New Orleans. New Orleans is this very unique place. It is. Yeah. I try it's so hard to explain. It's very hard to explain. You had to experience it yourself. But when we went into high school, we didn't kinda break away from that group. Yeah. You're right. Because when people go to high school, they're like, I wanna be like you know, they most people, which we should I guess we should have felt that, like, need or want to, like it was an all girls Catholic school. We were but they're like, oh, now we can go meet boys at different schools and, like, you were cool if you We did not do that. No. We didn't do that. I don't think I went on that one date in high school. We're in drama club. Yes. Sassy was president of what it was called STK. Yes. And I was her vice president. Yes. I pretty much followed in all your footsteps until you came here. My footsteps were fun. Your footsteps were fun. You went to LSU for a second and then you were like, screw that. I'm going to LA. And I was like, well, I'm gonna stay right right here in Louisiana. Yeah. You found your way though. You went into a sorority. You did that thing. I feel like you found yourself a little bit, you know? True. But in high school, everyone that we met, like, all the girls, like, they were going to football games, they were going to parties, drinking beer, making out with boys, like, they were go it was everyone was, like, stereotypically, like, high school cool. You know what I mean? And we were not at all. And the way you, like, could figure out, like, who was in whose group was by lunch tables and the lunch tables, like, held about 10 people. So, like, most groups, like, had, like, 10 people in them. We had, like, 4 or 5. There was 4 of us. 4. It was me, you, Shannon. Shannon and Amelie. Amelie joined a little late. Yeah. Jamie left us. Jamie fled. You're right. So it was it was like She blew the coop. I mean, me, you and Shannon were like this, like, okay, We're like this you can't break us. You know what? It honestly kind of reminds me of and I know you don't watch Vanderpump Rules because you don't like to see it's scary seeing you on on TV because I because I know you and seeing you on TV is just, like, surreal to me. I can't get it through my head that you're on the tube. I can't no one calls it that. The tube. I call the tube. But if you did watch that watch it, which I don't f**king I don't care. I don't care. But if you did, you would I have 2 best friends here that, Katie and Kristen, and we're like this little threesome, like, loyal little You're like your own lunch table. We are. We're our own lunch table and you can't break us. You you can't. Like, we fight, we get in arguments, we go, like, a week without talking or, like, you know, things happen, of course, but, like, it reminds me of the way me, you, and Shannon were in high school. Like, sorry. It doesn't matter how much time has passed. Yes. No matter what, it's cool. We're fine. Pick up wherever we left off. Yes. I maybe that's like a thing. Maybe I just, like, really like that, having, like, a small little crew. What does that say? Does that wait. I don't under I don't I'm trying to figure out what that means. It means that you are genuine in your relationships, but does it mean that I just like to boss people around and only 2 people will let me do it? I'm joking. Katie and Kristen, don't let me boss them around. It sucks a*s. They used to. They don't anymore. And Shannon never let me boss her around. I tried, but she was such a she had to be like a contrarian all the time. Shannon, you and Shannon were head and you were neck and neck. Head and neck. Neck and neck. Neck and neck for leader of the group. But Shannon didn't want to. She didn't want to. She just didn't wanna have a leader. So you can't have you can't have your cake and eat it too. Shannon, if you don't wanna be if you don't wanna boss people around but you also don't wanna be bossed around, you get you got it doesn't work that way. And then there's little old me in the middle who just, like, does whatever anybody else wants to do. Yeah. But you know what's really cool is that you like it. That's how you like to live your life. I'm just a big old weenie. No. It's not about, like, it's not about that. It's the fact that you're you're confident and content in yourself and you don't need to prove anything. Like, you don't have to, Yeah. Boss anyone around. You don't have to fight back, like, to prove something about yourself. You're like, yeah. I like myself and whatever. I'll go along with it. Okay. We'll go with that, actually. I think so. Thank you, Stas. Can I just say that, like, I when Alex and I were in high school, she legitimately let me boss her around all the time, like, in a fun way? It's not like I was mean. Well, that's how we became so close. Because I bossed you around? Yes. Really? Here's this little person. I can just, like, take okay. That makes you sound like a terrorist. Stas, let's go back to the Spice Girls. Okay. Did nobody talk about the Spice Girls yet? No. Alright. Grammar School. We're taking you back. Elementary school. Some people don't call it grammar school. We call it grammar school in New Orleans. Yeah. And in about 7th grade 4th grade, Alex. No. 4th grade was Spice Girls. That was the birth of Spice Girls? Yes. I was 9 years old. Oh, my god. Okay. Stasi and Shannon and Jamie, our friend Jamie, formed a group and they were the Spice Girls, and they would perform at our school fair. And it was like a big ordeal, they would they would practice during recess. We practiced all year. And all the other girls wanted to be a part of it. Everybody knows there's only 5 Spice Girls, so they they chose they picked and chose who was gonna be part of the Spice Girls. And it was that's what set the tone for the rest of our lives for bossing me bossing people around. And that yes. Is that where it started? You were the leader of the pack from day 1. Day 1 of 4th grade. And the Spice Girls are people that, like I mean, you not just everyone can be a Spice Girl. I'm joking. Okay. I'm kidding. But no. We really did make people have, like, odd we had to make people audition. They had auditions during recess. I'm not kidding. We would spend our weekends watching the VHS's of, like, Spice Girl, like, concerts and memorizing every dance, every move. Like, it was I lived, ate, and breathed it. Like I'm having flashbacks. My whole life, like, like, my whole year would just was just all about leading up to the fair where we could perform as the Spice Girls every year. My grandmother made me a British flag dress when I was 9 and Remember that. My dad accidentally put it in the washing machine and it turned white and I was so upset that in the middle it was the day before the fair. In the middle of the night, my dad goes and finds, like, 2 stores and finds, like, permanent markers in red and blue and spent, like, all night just, like, coloring over it so that it was decent. The flashbacks are I I bossed my dad around too. I will have you know I was not chosen as a Spice Girl. I was on the side. I think you chose me as the stage manager or some crap like that. Were you like an understudy? Something like that. Yes. You might have actually been the stage manager. I mean, I like to, like, delegate and be like, you know Oh, you are so sweet. You can you can do that. Thank you. I just wanna, like, thank you for that opportunity, Sassy. It was just I can't tell you what what it's done for me. Hey, guys. I wanna take a break here and talk about something. If you've listened to my show or breathed oxygen for that matter, you know that life can be messy and far from perfect. Turns out, same thing goes for your skin. Mederma to the rescue. New Mederma quick dry oil is a brand new formulation on the market and it helps improve the appearance of skin, scars, and stretch marks. It's also the number one doctor and pharmacist recommended brand. Most importantly, it's quick drying, so no more waiting for greasy oils to absorb. I mean, who has the time for that? Besides using it for scars and stretch marks, you can use it just to keep your skin hydrated. It's great to use on skin imperfections. But if you're like me and you're already perfect, j k guys, you can also use it as part of your daily skin care routine. Mederma quick dry oil features nourishing botanicals and contains no artificial dyes or perfumes, so you don't need to worry about it irritating your skin. Sometimes pretty doesn't have to hurt. Look, you have enough to worry about every day, but don't let your skin be one of them. Check out Moderna today. Look for it in the first aid section. Yes, the first aid section at major retailers. Welcome to Play It, a new podcast network featuring radio and TV personalities talking business, sports, tech, entertainment, and more. Play it at play dot it. Most of us don't really ever think about, like, hey. I think it's time for me to buy a new mattress. No. Like, imagine okay. If you're 20 something, you kind of just, like, got what like your older sibling had or your parents bought you for college or if you didn't go to college, like, you you finagled away to like purchase one off of Craigslist if your parents were taking care of you or like you got one from a friend. You never, like, really think, like, you know, I think I need a new mattress. Like, you know you're, like, being an adult when you're in the market for a new mattress. And sleeping is one of my favorite things, if not my favorite thing. Okay. Might not be my favorite thing. I feel like ranch and wine and my dogs might be my favorite thing, but sleeping is up there. And that all depends on what you're sleeping on. Okay? So let me talk about Casper. I have loved Casper, and I've been so proud to have him as a sponsor now for the whole length of my podcast, honestly. And what makes Casper so great is that they have developed a mattress that has supportive memory foams for a sleep surface that, like, it gets just the right sink and it's just the right bounce, and it's not like your your typical mattress. And it comes to your door in this box. It's, like, all rolled up in a box. It it looks like it's, like, defying gravity or science when it comes to your door. And it's not that expensive because they're not giving their mattresses to mattress stores. I mean, we know this. Mattresses are notoriously expensive. It's a pain in the a*s. That's part of the reason most of us don't think about buying new ones. But, Casper, with that, you are going straight to the source. There is no markup on the price. You are getting exactly what you deserve for the price. I personally like that because I'm somebody like, I can't stand being hot. I don't like sweating. And when I'm sleeping, that is the absolute freaking worst. But it's a breathable mattress. So it, like, regulates your temperature during the night, and that is just a huge help for someone like me. But what's also fantastic is that they're giving everyone, and they've always done this, a 100 night home trial. And that's with free delivery, free returns. It's completely risk free. So if you're buying a Casper mattress and if you're ordering one online, it's almost like you're not ordering it yet. Like, you don't have to commit until, like, 3 months later. That's what I feel when I I order clothes online because I'm like, well, I can just return it. So, like, once I click, like, purchase, I'm like, technically, I didn't purchase it yet. I purchase it when I try it on in my own house, look in the mirror, and decide I'm keeping that. That's when I feel like the transaction really goes down. So they are giving my listeners $50 towards any mattress purchase when you visit casper.com/stassy, and that's casper.com/stassy, and use my promo code Stassy at the end. So you have to do that twice. You gotta put Stassy in twice. Casper.com/stassy and use my promo code Staci at the end, and that's $50 towards any mattress. There really isn't, like, anything to lose. So if you're in the market for a mattress, if you feel like yours is old or gross or just like you're not getting the best night sleep, try it because it's free delivery and free returns. So if you don't like it, it's really not that big of a deal. Amazing. Talking pop culture, reality TV, celebrity gossip, relationships, and more. This is straight up with Stassie. You know, Alex, I will say this. When I talk about, like I joke sometimes and I'm like, bossy Stassie. And my friends are like, you're not bossy at all. Like, in fact, you don't, like, ever boss people around. I'm sarcastic. I'm sarcastic. Yes. But I'm I'm sad that I've grown up. Like, it makes me sad that I've, like that I don't boss anyone around. Like, it it was fun, but now just no one listens to me. So it's like I gave it up a while ago because you're dealing with adults here. I know. It's so boring. I'm so sorry. Well, I'm still pretty, you know, but I don't have the same satisfaction out of it anymore. Like, it doesn't give me the same satisfaction. Like, I like to feel like I'm more in a team. Closet today. Okay. Well, interesting you say that because I did want to explain what our lives were like in high school because okay. Like she said, we were both in the drama club. I made excellent grades. She did not. Thank you. Thank you for pointing that out. They weren't horrible. I they were you know why they were bad? It's because of you. Why? Because I did your homework. You would be I would help you with your homework. Not not. That was it was like a it was like a switch off. Where were you when I was taking the test? We didn't have phones back then. I couldn't text you answers to things. I did the best that I could. I neglected my studies. Because Stasse had the ability to multitask where she didn't recognize my inability to not multi- to multitask. And, we we- she would call me at the, at like midnight and be like, come on over, I need my room cleaned. And I'm like, well, I'm trying to fix finish my freaking religion homework, Stassi. But I would come over whenever she wanted. But I would always help you do your homework though. Not always. Yes, I would. There's no I every time I remember no. I remember staying awake until 3 in the morning, like, helping with homework, studying for tests. Okay. It's not all your fault. I'm a big procrastinator. Yes. You would actually be the one that'd be like, we'll do it later. I wanna We'll do it later. We'll do it later. We'll do it later. I'm like, you have to do it. Like, you just No. I remember. And we would we would go to Chateau Coffee House, which was across the street from Mount Carmel every day. I'm so fun. We would get there and I would drink coffee, Stassie would do homework and I would say I'll do that later, I'll do that later and she would finish and we'd get to her her house and she would she would say let's clean my room and when she said let's, she meant you clean my room, and I would do it like a like a slam. No. Like legit, like deep cleaning. Yes. Like, hands and knees in my bathroom, scrubbing, vacuuming, like, I mean, full on cleaning. I'm a clean girl. But that's a clean girl. So impressive. I mean, my mom when we went to school, I would call my mom. My mom was the best. Like, she would check me out whenever I wanted to. I would call her during PE, and I'm like, mom, I hate PE. Check me out too. Like, I'm gonna get there. I was like, I hate pee, mom. Like, it really sucks. Like, can you just you know I make straight a's and I do everything that I need to do. Like, you know, I'm a responsible kid. Can you just, like, come pick me up? I don't wanna run 2 miles. God, I was such a lazy such a lazy ass, such a fat a*s. And she would check me out. But then it got to the point where I was like, mom, but can you check me and Alex out? And my mom And she would. Would just come and and my mom was friends with your mom, but I don't think she ever even really told her. I mean, they would always they would always just get drunk together. So like New Orleans right there. Yes. She would just come be like, alright. I have to check out Alex and Stasi. Alright. We would go home, watch French kiss with my mom. So You'd clean. This is like almost every day. We would watch French kiss on my mom. My mom just let you sleep over every single day. Netflix or on Amazon Prime. Can somebody please put that on? ITunes. Is it not on iTunes? I don't I didn't check there. Okay. But I've been, like, searching for French kiss for the longest time and I cannot get it. But anyway, Stassi was a rule breaker of sorts. Oh, I know where you're going. Yes. And Hold on. Let me let me story tell because I know where you're going with this. Okay. Are we going with are are we going into when you were caught for something I made you do? Okay. So I it's not that I was a rule breaker because I am actually a rule I do follow rules. I think that rules are there for a reason. Like, I don't cut in front of people in line, you know, like You're respectful. I'm like, you know, yes. I'm respectful, like, you know, if I get if I have to be somewhere at a certain time because it's my job, like, I follow the rules. Like, I don't we went to an all girls Catholic school where there was a lot of rules. Like, a mirror socks rolled down. Yeah. Like, you could it was just like You would get in trouble. That's you had to have in the right place Yes. At all times. So then it just got a little exhausting. So I'm like, okay. I know that I'll make straight a's. I know I'll be a good student. I know that I'm gonna no. I'm gonna, like, do what I'm supposed to do as a good student, but there are some things I know that, like, I can skate over. So they made it hard actually to, like, miss class without your parents checking you out. You had to get a sheet of paper to get, like, certain teachers to sign, then you had to get another sheet of paper to get somebody else to sign. You could miss the first class without getting caught, like, because we had, like It's private school. There are hurdles to go. You couldn't you couldn't just, like, skip it. Yeah. You couldn't even have, like, a visitor on campus. Like, if you were on campus during certain hours, like, you're automatically a pedophile. Yeah. You're right. Pretty much. So I remember though getting those 2 sheet those 2 forms we had to get signed. I stole one of each and I got them I got copies. I remember getting copies of, like, the big one and just having the copies in my purse so that I could always have that. So I was able to like get out. Okay. And then but then because we were able to skip first period, I'm like okay you can skip 1st period without them calling your family, without them calling your parents. So I would either sleep in my car That would happen. Yes. I'd sleep in my car. I was wondering how I got this idea. Yes. Or I would go and hide in the dressing room of the drama theater area. There's part a of the story. Yes. Okay. And so Alex who is a little chicken s**t chicken s**t is right. I never, I don't break any rules, the socks rolled down rule, never broken, shirt tucked in, name tag on at all times, let me tell you I never got demerits, ever, and if I got one it was like, I was in a cold sweat and I was like begging on my knees, would it, you know, just trying to make it right. I know. So Yeah. So one morning okay. I was doing really bad in physics because of Stasi. No. Just clean your room. Instead of doing my physics homework, I was doing really poorly in physics and I hadn't done my homework. I wonder why. No, it's because I'm a procrastinator, like I said before. I hadn't done my homework and I didn't wanna that was my first period, I didn't wanna go to cla*s. And so I got dropped off at school, my dad dropped me off, I got out and I was like, okay, I'm gonna do the thing. I'm gonna do the thing that Saucy taught me about. I'm just gonna go in the theater and like hide in the dressing room and and go to my 2nd period class when physics is over. So I'm in there, I'm sitting and unfortunately Did you turn the lights off and hide in the costumes? No. Okay. That's part of it. Okay. The problem was it was at the time of year we were we were Preparing for a show. For a show. Yeah. And so our seamstress, also our home ec teacher was Shout out to Miss Mooney. Miss Mooney. She will never remember this but it has changed, it has scarred me. The image of her walking into that dressing room, let me tell you, and I'm just sitting there and it is 1st period. If you're not in a classroom during 1st period, you are just might as well just die and like No. If you're caught yeah. You're not allowed to be anywhere else. No. You're not. You you either missed it and you're not getting caught somewhere because you're either at home or sleeping in your car like I did very often. Like, literally, I would not even sleep on the back seat. I would get down, like, on on the bottom of the car just in case a teacher walked past my car. Yeah. I mean, you just gotta keep you know, you gotta cover all your bases. That's why when you hide in the dressing room, you turn the lights off and you sneak into the costume rack so that even if they open the door, they don't see you. Our theater teacher allowed us to do this, so I thought it would be okay. And she walks in and I mean, I can't you can just imagine where it went from there. And I just so happened to have my g*****n socks rolled down, excuse my language, but they were rolled down, which are never rolled down. So she gave me a demerit for having my socks rolled down and sent me to the disciplinarian and it was just like all downhill from there. All downhill from there. And you're not doing a good job of describing what she was like when she saw you. Oh, And you're not doing a good job of describing how you felt. I shudder to think about it. It just really Like, do you remember what she said to you when she walked in? She said, we're trying to tell a story here. She said, what are you doing in here? That's scary. Yeah. And I said, I'm doing homework. And she said, aren't you supposed to be in class? And I said, yes, cause I never have a good excuse for anything, I could have made up a 100 excuses, if I was sassy I would have come up with a 1,000 but I just crumbled and right then and there it was over. I got you don't you got y'all you don't understand. I just have to tell you what Alex reminds me of this 20 whenever I see her, like, this this, like, isolated moment haunts her f**king dreams as a I think about it. Do you know that? Because you every time I'm around you, like, you find a way to bring it up. My god. It's not that bad. She just caught you and gave you a different Okay. Besides the 4 speeding tickets I've got in my life, this one was like amongst those. I don't break rules besides the speed, like you know, I break the law by speeding but who doesn't do that? This, I really I don't know if I've ever gotten a speeding ticket actually. I don't think I have. Good for you. You're just lucky. Some people are lucky. The world's against me. I'm I'm just lucky. Convinced. No. It is. But yes. Besides getting in trouble with the law, the first four those four times, I got in trouble with miss Mooney. Miss Mooney, if you're listening, thanks for scarring me for life, sending me to miss Gilbo who reamed me, made me call my dad, then sister Camille Ann called my parents that night. Are you joking? No. No way. And she was like for that? Yes. That is wait. Are you telling me Sister Camille Ann. Yes. Our principal Called my parents. Of a giant a*s all girls private Catholic school decided to take time out of her night to call your f**king parents to be like, yo, your daughter, she was doing her homework in the dressing room and had her socks rolled down. Like, she sounds like a troublemaker. What about the chicks who were like, I don't know, having sex, doing drugs, getting drunk, doing really bad things. We didn't do anything that bad. You didn't finish your physics homework and you were like f**k I should probably just like go do it. Well, that's There are worse things. That's what she said on the to my parents. She said, I'm looking at her record. It looks very clean. I'm wondering why she did something like this. And my Did they say Stassi told me it was a bad influence? My excuse my parents was Stassi told me it would be okay. Shut the f**k. Shut you never shut the f**k up. Shut the f**k up. Mister Rinda left me and Stassi did this. You never told me that. No. They never my parents love you. You know, you just saw them. No. I know that. I think they find me amusing that I got I'm a little I must I slightly bad influence. Yeah. Not really. And so my dad was like Stassi's posse is skipping class so you thought it would be okay? I'm like, dad I'm so bad at physics. Don't be mad at me. Yes. This is what happened. And to this day it haunts me but I'll have you know also our high school would breathalyze us before every event, every dance, prom, semi formal. I totally forgot about that. Yep. You're so right. They would breathaly. That. And yeah. So we couldn't drink or anything and I didn't drink till I got to college. That's how much of a goody 2 shoes I was. I really didn't either. I mean, I didn't I I didn't drink until after hurricane Katrina. So it wasn't until, like, our senior year when we were displaced and we didn't know what life was. You know what I mean? We were going from high school to high school because ours was flooded and then when we finally got back to our high school, they didn't give a s**t about actually testing us. They were like, just have fun. No. They tested us. I feel like it was so easy. Okay. You might feel like you were tested. I feel like But here's the funny tests were so easy because they didn't they felt bad for us. Oh, tests. Yeah. They're talking about the, breathalyzer test. Oh, no. No. I mean like I was like, well, you can't there's only one way to pass that. Don't drink. No. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The tests were easy, but when sorry. Keep going with that. Well, no. I think I cut you off and I apologize. I was saying that they when they breathalyzed us, the funny thing that came out of that is my mom sent this, like, long email Wait. Or Hold on. I'm this is ringing a bell. Please keep explaining. She sent this long email to the disciplinarian, miss Gilbo, talking about how I'm how much of a good basically explaining in words how much of a good goody 2 shoes I was. And she's like, my my daughter's never she doesn't do drugs. She doesn't drink alcohol. Your mom was probably like, I try and get her to drink alcohol and she won't. I think you might have said that. Because our moms were just like, you got luscious. They would just we would all hang out together and they'd be like, Alex, Stacey, Shannon, like, just have it. Have a sip. And they're wasted and we're like, I don't know. My mom will be like, you gotta lighten up. Take a sip of my martini. Oh my god. I'm on Accutane. I can't. I was on Accutane. We were on Accutane trying to get rid of our pimples. We were not worried about getting drunk. And then, so my mom sends this email and she's like, you, my daughter is like innocent. This is so unlike her. She follows all the rules. She doesn't even drink or anything. So the next dance that comes up, miss Guilbeau was like You mean so this is your the letter that your mom sent because of the phone call that sister Camille Ann made? Exactly. Exactly. And so I'm just filling in the gaps. Thank you. And so we get to the dance where they're breathalyzing everybody and miss Gilvo, the disciplinarians at the head of the table given out the breathalyzers and I get there and she just waves me on through. Like I Shut up. Yeah. I don't remember that. Was I at that dance? It was our prom. My our senior prom? Yeah. Our senior it was no. It was it was semi formal with the rain. Okay. So because we were the Katrina class because we have yeah. And they had remember the the background of the photo? Who'd you go with? What were you wearing? I was wearing a black, like, silky dress thing. Was that I think I brought Josh Musso. I have no idea who that is. Wait. And then the background of the of the picture was like a boat, like a swamp boat. This is so ringing it's supposed to be a joke like we're in a storm and Was it the winter formal? Was it the one where they announced like who won what in the senior? No that that was prom. No they did it twice. They did it twice. Okay. Because I didn't go to prom and I went to the winter formal. You didn't go to prom? And that's when I got most talented. You were not going to prom? Yeah. No. I didn't because I was this is embarrassing. Remember I lost my virginity on prom night to someone who was not in New Orleans? You were on Amazing Race. I don't wanna talk. I don't wanna go into any more details. It's mortifying. The most mortifying way to ever lose someone's virgin to the most embarrassing way to lose your virginity. I mean, speak to me. I mean, remind me. I was a weirdo. I was on the my dad made me go on the amazing race as a gothic 16 year old and then there was, like, this big, like, this big, like, like, reunion. Sassy likes the things you just got. I was semi gothic. You were not gothic. No. I know I wasn't, like, real gothic. I didn't like f**king I was just, like, I'm gonna dye my hair black and I'm gonna embrace my white skin and I'm just gonna be weird. 500 different hair colors in high school. Yeah. I know. I just wanted to think that I was, like, edgy and cool and just, like, I'm not doing mainstream s**t. Like, no. I'm different. I'm different. Yeah. I'm different. And so they had, like, the the amazing race people, like, had this reunion and it was, like, in, I think, Chicago I don't know, a city in the Midwest. I was like, I really wanna go and my dad and my mom gave me the permission to go by myself and meet up with my friends from them from there and it was on prom night that I happened to have lost my virginity but not to like not Not at prom. Not at prom. Not because of that. Why don't I remember this? Because I I buried it for a while too, like, because it was so horrifying. When you got back, you weren't at our table. What do you mean? At our, like, friend table. That's I was going back and forth. Yeah. No. More like back. No. Back and forth. No. Back and forth. s**t got real. s**t got real. Sassy realized that we weren't caught up for her. That is so not true. It is so true. And then No way. Yes. And then she went to another friend group. True story. Did I get in a fight with you guys? No. We weren't cool enough. And That is so I don't have a recollection of feeling you guys weren't cool enough. Okay. It's okay because Sheena, your friend you're one of your best friends Sheena came into your life that way. Oh, okay. Yes. Because during hurricane Katrina, I was just yes. We were all displaced. Katrina messed everything. Yeah. We really got screwed. And so then like we all me, Alex, and Shannon and never we all went to different schools. I I went to your school for a little while I thought. Right? I was in Baton Rouge. I went for like a solid 2 weeks I think to that school. And then you went to Rommel T. And then yeah my parents moved they tried to get me to go to another school in Denham Springs and it was a school and I started crying when they walked me me through it. I was like, I don't belong here. It was scary. I was like, there were boys there. I was like, I can't boys in my school. I'm like, that's a public school with boys there. And it's not that I had anything against public schools. It's like I was just used to no boys, like, I can't just all of a sudden as an like, a a 16, 17 year old girl who's not comfortable with herself after, like, losing, like, being displaced and everything being f**ked up and not knowing what it's like to, like to go into a new school that's completely different than your old school with boys and you can wear whatever you want. And I don't know what people wear as a senior in high school and, like, it was so it was so sad and there were flies. Dramatic for everybody. I remember there being flies. I was like, dad, I can't go to school with their flies. Please. Where were their flies? I don't know. They're just I remember there being flies everywhere, like, in New Orleans. No. It was, like, right outside of Baton Rouge. Denim Springs. I don't know about the flies, but so then I went to Rummel t when Sheena, Manina, and I t stands for transitional. So they made this, like, hodgepodge school Yes. In New Orleans after Katrina for all the displaced students that came back with their Katrina for all the displaced students that came back with their families to New Orleans. And so it was just like all the Catholic school by the way, there's a lot of Catholic, private Catholic schools in New Orleans like MPS I'm not a practicing Catholic. I don't even I just have to throw it out there. Just like New Orleans is predominant I don't do any of that. Yes. And so they combined all the schools and they called it at, one of the all boys Catholic schools called Rummel, and they named it Rummel Transitional. And so, if you were back in New Orleans and you were a part of the Catholic community, you went to that school. So it was just like and that's what Sassy was talking about how they would be so easy. Everyone I know in their senior year made a 4.0 Yeah. At Rummel Trademark. Which meant I made a 4.8. Oh, you are so smart. No. Meaning, we all had it easy and I was in advanced classes. What is this? Okay. So smart. I still didn't make it into USC. You didn't? No. That was like that what broke my heart. I didn't know that. And I was a legacy. And I'm like, dude, I've I made a 4 point o or higher 247. I was president of the drama club. I was in student council before I decided to become alternative. What the f**k? Like, that's so not fair. You're right. Yeah. No one's not that smart. I wasn't that smart. You're still well rounded, I guess, enough. But What do they want? At rumble tea, that's when Kishina, Menina and I became best friends freshman year. Not Kuz Sheena Menina. Her name's Sheena Menina. You just put a k before her name. You say because sheena Menina instead of like Kuz Sheena Menina. K sorry go. Nitpicky son of a b***h. Okay. I didn't want anybody to think her name was Kashina. They know it's not. She has a podcast now. I taught her. I had no Raw Talk with Sheena. I knew. Yeah. So the I'd so do you remember when I met when we met her the 1st day of freshman year at Chateau, the coffee shop across from Mount Carm, our high school, where we would go every single afternoon after school? Never meeting her. No. Yeah. I'll never forget that because, like, I felt like we were just, like, fast friends. Like, we had just, like, this mental it's almost like love at first sight when you, like, meet a dude, but it was, like, friendship at first sight. And then we both wanted to be the boss. The whole time you wanted to cheat on our friend group to go hang out with Sheena Mani. Cush Sheena Mani. Shut up. But then Sheena Mani. I love you, by the way, if you're listening. I love Sheena so much. Remember we had a falling out? We both were bought we both were, like, bossy and we just butt we butted heads and then for 2 years after that, we didn't speak. We, like, would be nice to each other but it was, like, awkward because it's like, woah. We just went from, like, being really close fast friends to just, like, yep. No. That's done. I sort of remember that. Yeah. Just like I sort of remember cheating on you. You cheated on me. But that's when I You left me. But that's when at Rummel Tea, Sheena and I were both displaced and ended up there. Rekindled our friendship. Okay. Rekindled our romance. That's how that happened. And when we got back to Mount Carmel, I was really disappointed to see that Stassi was too cool for our friend group. I wasn't too cool. I spent Graduation night, I was so depressed because you went out with all their group. Everyone was invited to that party. Not me. I wasn't cool enough. The whole entire class was there. Oh, really? Yeah. s**t. Like, legitimately, the whole grade. Like, everyone was there. It was like a it was a grade party. I was hanging out on my chaise lounge in my parents' living room. That makes me sad. You've never told me that. Well, we can't go back. Well, here we are now. We're here right now. No. I know. But that makes me sad. Oh my god. That makes me feel bad. Really? Don't feel bad. I do feel bad. It is like way back in time, but I did miss you. I was sad that things had the whole time period was just sad in itself. It was just Hurricane Katrina, f**k s**t up. Really messed everything up. Everyone was displaced, confused. Listen. I was by myself. I had to make friends. You know what it was like? It was like New Orleans broke up with us. Yes. It felt like a massive breakup and I can I am I can speak to that because I just went through a horrible breakup? Yeah. And not a horrible one, but, like, you know, I went through the horrible feelings of a breakup and it was just like that. Like, New Orleans wanted to break up with us and it was so painful. Everything was awful. And when we got back, we're just trying to put the puzzle pieces back together. You know what? It wasn't fair. You guys all got to be together in Baton Rouge and I was alone by myself. I had to make friends. I had to what you want me to just sit and wait for you like I was f**king in the notebook? Yeah. Rachel McAdams. I did. I wrote you every day. Yeah. I wanted you to be like Rachel McAdams and I wanted to get back in you to be like I feel bad because, like, I don't mind my you know how you remember what you wanna remember? Yes. I'm do I think I've done I've done that because I don't remember never I never remember not being your friend. Somehow have the curse of remembering things that I don't wanna remember. Like, I'll wake up with an embarrassing moment in my head. It sucks. Yes. And I'll just clench my eyes like please go away. Please go away. Please go away. Wait. Like, I legit can't think of anything worse. That is like like what did you do in a past life to deserve that? I don't know. It's called anxiety. I think a lot of people have it. But I don't There's a little thing called Xanax. Alcohol. Klonopin. I don't take any of that. There are pills for that. No. I'd My mom's taught us about them. Well, they did and they took those but I I just meditated out or drink it out. You meditate? Yeah. When I clench my I call that meditating. So Sheena Menina actually meditates and she tries to get me to meditate. I'm like, Sheena, I'm not the meditating type. That's great. I heard it is too. Listen, and that's great. It's very healing and, like, better than medicine. You know what I will say? The only meditation I've ever done and it actually it's, like, better than it makes me feel so much more refreshed than even, like, take or, like, awake than even taking, like, an Adderall or having like an espresso is if you do a meditation app for 10 minutes, it you just listen to it. It'll put you to sleep and then wake you up and I'm like the way that it goes, I wake up and it's like I've never felt more, like, alive. What app is this? I don't even know. There are a million of them. If you just go to meditation apps, like, in you can test out which ones work for you, but it's it's really cool. I can't meditate on my own. That's something that I can't do. Sheena, when she stays at my apartment, will literally come into this room and and just be like, I'm gonna go no. She just goes, I'm gonna go meditate. I'm like, okay. She doesn't bring you along with her. No. I don't want she knows I'm not I'm like, please don't do that to me. She knows don't do that to me. Really? So she comes in here and just meditates in the morning every morning and then comes out and she's I mean, b***h is always in a good mood. She is. She is always in a f**king good mood. She blew me away because I haven't seen her since high school and when we went to dinner with her at pump, she was just like she's so, like, selfless in the way she talks to people, like, it was all about what are you doing in your life and how, you know, you know, she's just very she coaches you and Yeah. And and the way she speaks is like, so soothing and just always has, like, a resting, like, peaceful face. I don't know. I Yeah. She's something to aspire to. You know, I would encourage you to well, I mean, you can't get closer to her. You don't live in New Orleans anymore. No. I can't. So but that is that's, you know, when people say, like, there's a silver lining and everything. Silver lining of hurricane Katrina brought her back into my life, and I'm I'm so thankful for that. True. And I could imagine not having her. I'm glad that y'all are so close. She's a wonderful person to have in your life. She's like a freaking nature. I mean, that she can't be like, how how does I literally look at her and I'm like, dude, people people like you exist. I'm like the opposite of Sheena. The complete opposite of Sheena. In what way? Every way. Every way that you could be. And maybe that's why our friendship works. I guess I can see it. Yeah. Y'all are different but you're right. I'm not calm at all. You're calm. I don't know how to self soothe. Hey, unless pills are involved. We just do about it. 2 hours of Disney Channel music today, and it was very calming while I shopped online. So, like, that was I mean, I had Disney music. Everybody has their ways of calming down. Yes. And Sheena can calm herself down, like, just by using her mind. She is powerful. She's a powerful woman. Woah. I was expecting to only do, like, a half an hour with you because I was, like, you might get bored of this. I'm sorry. When are we on? We've 45 minutes already. Woah. Woah. Wait. Do you think do you think all my listeners are gonna hate me now after this? Because in high school I bossed my best friends around. Let me I'm gonna ask let me clarify this. Stas, she did she was a bossy girl, but she in a in a good way, that's just part of her personality. She's just very strong headed. Said or? Yeah. Strong dash headed Yeah. Hyphenated. And she helped shape me. Wait. Really? Yes. Of course. You're the one that pushed me into all, you know, Mount Carmel had like a 100,000,000 clubs. You pushed me into most doing most of the clubs that I did, especially theater, which I never thought I would do. And I was your vice president if you remember, but I did all the duties of president. I'll have you know and she just told me what to do and I just did them, remember? But she was very passionate about theater and and performing and that made me passionate about it. And what else do we do together? We did all sorts of things that I she kinda like led me and I guess that's kind of person I am that I need guidance. A lot of people aren't like that. They can't think for themselves and they need someone to kind of show them the way and you did that for me. That's nice but I hope I didn't like You opened up a lot of doors for me. You into doing things. You know what I mean? No. Yeah. I forced you to like, no. I didn't force because I just be like, you had a choice. You could have said, no. I don't wanna clean your bathroom. I'm like, alright. And I'm not gonna help you do your homework. Our time together, we we had such a good time. That But we It was so much fun. I can't I'm, like, thinking of all these stories. They're all coming to my head. But you know what times weren't fun? When I was whenever you didn't spend the night at my house and I had to pick you up for school and you were always Oh, that's my favorite. 15 to 20 minutes late, I would warn you and I would be like, I will be there at this time or, like, I think I had a phone by then and I'm like, I've been calling your house phone. You would still be in f**king bed and be like, take your f**king Adderall or something. g*****n it. You know I can't stand tardiness. I can't stand being late. Stas, that is my favorite story. Stas, she used to call me the dinosaur. Am I allowed to tell this? Do we have time? Yeah. Okay. She used to call me the dinosaur. She used to drive around this like little what was that called? What was that? The Via Cross. Isuzu Via Cross. Via Cross. Isuzu Via Cross and it was a 2 door vehicle, 2 door SUV and my dad found like the weirdest f**king car to give me. Before you would before we had laptops, before everybody had a laptop of their own and we would have to carry around all of our textbooks And they were tell me that kids don't do that anymore? They don't have textbooks. Textbooks don't exist. I'm pretty sure they don't. They don't have to cover their textbooks with laminate? They don't have to do that? No. You cover your not your textbooks with laminate. You cover them, like, the work The workbooks with laminates. And then you do a paper cover on your textbooks. Yes. Cover your textbooks. I'm checking to see if you've covered your textbooks. And was like, who could have, like, the cutest cover? Seminar? I don't know. That was a good impression, whoever it was. But we yes. I'm pretty sure that that that doesn't exist anymore. That's so sad. And that all students They just use computers. Computers. That's really f**ked up and it weirds me out. Back problems to this day because of all the textbooks we had. That wait. I was not aware of that. Okay. But So I had to get into Sassy's car with a it was like it was like a 24 inch backpack because I had like 5 huge thick tech like go to the library and find the thickest books you can and put them in a backpack and then like try and get into a 2 door vehicle. Okay? And so when I would get over like, oh, I can't get in. And so she would call me the dinosaur. Right? Yeah. Yeah. Oh my god. Was it the dinosaur? I'm pretty sure. K. Because you had to get in the back. Yeah. Because I had to pick up other people too. So, like, whoever was first was in the front seat. Was it the gargoyle? Or what was it? I can't remember. So anyway, I I started taking Adderall in high school and I couldn't wake up in the morning. And it was it's just the like the worst. I can't I I can it it just reacted with me wrong and I couldn't wake up in the mornings. So I would wake up with stuff. She would come pick me up from school. For school? For school and I would still be sleeping, my alarm would be blasting in my ear and I would wake up with Stassi slamming on my alarm clock and standing over my bed saying, What are you doing? I'm here to pick you up, get up, put your uniform on, and I would freak out and get up and like not even brush my teeth and get in your car like dinosaur do my dinosaur grab my backpack. And I'm always a late person, so sometimes I would leave my backpack out on the curb and, like, that would represent me. I was still inside getting ready, but I would leave my backpack on the curb. Yeah. And so she would pull up and yeah. So she wouldn't freak out. She would see my backpack there. And so one day she tells me, I'm coming to your house tomorrow at 7:45. I want you outside. I don't want your backpack there. I don't want your brother there as your representative. Yes. Your brother. I don't want anything but you. And if you're not standing there with your backpack, I am driving off. And that scared the s**t out of me. Stacey, she will whip the You know what, Alex? She'll whip me in the shape. I've just realized that I, like, I have I have a friend just like like Kristen Doty. Uh-huh. One of my best friends here is exactly like that and I have to do the same f**k I have to deal with the same s**t. Always being late. I'm like, no. I'm not calling the Uber because I know you're gonna be 7 minutes to take to get out of the house, and then I'm gonna get a lower Uber rating, and that's why my rating sucks. I'm not calling Lyft. That's why my rating sucks. No. Like, I have to yell at her. I have to like, I don't like going anywhere with Kristen because she's late, and I feel the amount of anxiety that I feel, like, when I I'm I know that I'm even 2 minutes late, it's it's an unbearable feeling. I know. I can't stand it. Always freakishly on time. I can't stand it. Since like, god, since we were in college, I mean, in high school, you have always been on time and I've always been like, I'm not like a like extremely late person but like I'm always like a few minutes late as they say fashionably late. You know what? You know who came up with the term fashionably late? I'd love to know. I I actually don't know. That wasn't the point. I'm saying somebody who's just always f**king late and wanted to make it cool or, like, wanted to, like, feel better about the fact that they're always late. Like, that whoever came up with it, whoever coined the term fashionably late, it was somebody who's just always late. That's like it's lucky to for it to rain on your wedding day? Yeah. Yeah. Whoever came up with that was somebody who was like, woah, yo, it ran on my f**king wedding day and I need to make myself feel better about it. So I'm just gonna say that it's lucky. Exactly. I don't buy any of that s**t. Well, people that show up, like, too early sit there by themselves. Am I right? I don't show up early though. Times that it's gonna happen to you. I don't show up early. I show up on time. Like, so if I am happen to me early, I wait in my car then because I think it's just as rude to be early because then that makes people feel You feel like anxious. Yes. Anxious. So like I just make sure I'm like in that 5 minute span of like being on time. I wish I was more on time and I know what it takes to be on time but I don't have the like, the oomph. I don't have the I don't have the Stasi bite my a*s to do it. So I'm I'm late. You need me to guide you. So this is why y'all I'm trying to convince her to move here because this is it. She just got broken up with. Wait a minute. She just quit her job. It was sort of mutual. She lives in New York, okay, in New York City. She quit her job, got fine. It was actually sort of mutual. Thank you. Yes. Well actually he, you know what? You're way stronger than I could ever be and I will I will tell you that. You have more, Alex, you have more self worth and and confidence in, like, who you are as a person than I ever will because what you went through, I would have been like, okay. Yeah. I'll I'll try again. Like, yeah. Of course. Like, yeah. Okay. Like, let's no. Turning back. And you were like, f**k that. No turning back. So you are a strong human being and now you're here wondering if you should move from New York City to LA and I say f**k yeah. You have nothing to lose. You can find a new job, find a new apartment, find a new boyfriend or be single or whatever the f**k you want and I think that you should become an organizer, a closet organizer. That is actually a job. I have googled it because I need to I believe you. Yeah. It's a thing to organize rooms, organize with storage and all of that stuff and like make things look nice. It's like a feng shui type of thing and you're so good at it. And I gave you so much practice in high school, like, you're welcome, that, like, I just it's right? Thank you. I love organizing. It's like, I don't know. Something about it is very therapeutic and I I f**king loathe it. So this works out. And I asked her today, I said, I don't understand why somebody would hire a closet organizer because it's so easy to do. Is that something that people don't like to do or don't know how to do? And Stassi reassured me that Both. Yeah. It's both. And I just don't get it because it's always something that it's therapeutic for me and once your, like, house is decluttered, it declutters your mind. I'm sure some of you are familiar with that and it's so fun for me. Yeah. I want everyone to go follow Alex at a staffordone, and that's a s t a f f o r d one on Instagram. Leave comments on her photo saying, yeah. f**king become an organizer. I'll pay you. Become an organizer. Like, in l I mean, it would be in LA or whatever. I want people to encourage her. I need to light a fire under her a*s. It's like 10 years ago. It feels so good. I've missed lighting a fire under someone's a*s. So at a stafford 1. Thank you, sa*s. You're welcome. And also encourage me to move here because I am having a hard time Deciding. Deciding between New York and LA. I mean, I love New York so much but the sunshine in LA, like, just You can always go back. Your mom lives in New York City now. You can go visit any f**king time you want. That's true. It's so, like, that's why, you know, I go to New York all the time to visit and to work and on vacation that, like, I don't feel like I'm missing out anymore. Okay? Because you know how much I love New York. So Gotta bite the bullet. Just do it. You guys, please bully her. Bully me. Tell me what to do. Alex, thank you so much for doing this. I hope you didn't make my listeners hate me. I swear you guys. I'm a really good loyal friend hence why. Didn't say anything? No. I feel like no. Not you. Did I make them hate me? Because, like, there's I sound like a terrorist. Not at all. I really am like such a good friend of the world. That's how she shaped my life. And we are we're still friends. I'm sitting on her fluffy what is this? It's like a furry thing. Why? Because I'm loyal AF. Because you're you are. You have not changed. You're still a very sweet, humble, and pretty. Pretty. Yeah. Help me out. Full of life. And now tan. She's found this great tanning place too. Spray tan. Spray tan. It's called Mystic Tan. They have it everywhere. Oh, man. Okay. The things I will teach you. Don't there's no way anybody could hate you. Stasse is one of my best friends and I hope for a long long long long long long long time. Unless one of us dies. Okay. Love you. That's very nice. Khaleesi's talk to you next week. Bye. Bye.

Past Episodes

Stassi sits down with Sarah Hoover to discuss her memoir, The Motherload which is Stassi?s absolute favourite. Sarah opens up about her experiences with postpartum depression, childbirth  trauma, and those first few years of motherhood when she felt completely disconnected from her baby. It?s a raw, relatable conversation that will make every mom feel seen and less alone. They dive into the messy, beautiful truths of motherhood, the identity shifts, the boring baby classes, and  the magical moments that make it all worth it. Plus, they swap spooky ghost stories (because why not?) and how they?ve found their groove as mom?s. This episode is like a cozy chat  with your besties?honest, empowering, and a reminder that you?re not alone in the wild ride of motherhood.

This episode is sponsored by: OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com and use code STASSI for 15% off any product. Caraway Home - Visit Carawayhome.com/STASSI10 for an additional 10% off your next purchase or use code Stassi10 at checkout. Boll and Branch - Get 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at BollAndBranch.com/stassi. Quince - Go to Quince.com/stassi for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

01:21:38 2/12/2025

Stassi is spilling all the royal tea in this episode, and it?s all about the one and only Marie Antoinette! Joined by Even the Royals co-hosts Brooke Siffrin and Aricia Skidmore-Williams, they?re diving into the life of history?s most glamorous (and controversial) queen.

They?re breaking down the wildest rumors, the scandalous 18th-century tabloids (think TikTok drama channels), and the infamous Diamond Necklace Affair that helped topple the monarchy. Turns out, Marie was the original victim of cancel culture?hated for things she didn?t even do. Stassi opens up about her deep connection to Versailles, sharing why she?s so drawn to its opulence and drama. Together, they debate the highs and lows of royal life and tie it all together with a chat about Meghan Markle. 

This episode is sponsored by: OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com and use code STASSI for 15% off any product. Nutrafol - Get $10 off and free shipping at Nutrafol.com with code STASSI. Our pLace - Go to fromourplace.com and enter my code STASSI at checkout to receive 10% off sitewide. Lume -Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code Stassi at Lumedeodorant.com! #lumepod. RO - Go to RO.CO/STASSI to see if you qualify. Hiya - Receive 50% off your first order at hiyahealth.com/STASSI.

01:09:46 2/5/2025

Stassi is joined by her sister Georgi for a fun-filled catch-up packed with laughs and sisterly banter. They dive into the age-old debate: who?s got it worse?middle kids or firstborns? (Hint: Stassi?s the firstborn and has opinions.) They also dish on Hartford?s Wicked-meets-Frozen birthday bash and chat about how parents today are upping their playground game to avoid mom-shaming. Stassi fangirls over Outlander?s latest time-travel twists, reminisces about rocking the Castlecore vibe before it was trendy, and wraps up with dreamy Jonathan Bailey moments. This episode is pure sisterly fun!

This episode is sponsored by: OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com and use code STASSI for 15% off any product. Thrive Causemetics - Get an exclusive 20% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/STASSI. Rocket Money - Reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/STASSI . Cook Unity - Go to https://www.cookunity.com/STASSI for 50% off your first week. SKIMS - The Fits Everybody collection shop now at SKIMS.com and SKIMS stores. Liquid I.V. - Get 20% off your first order of Liquid I.V. when you go to LIQUIDIV.com and use code STASSI

01:11:54 1/29/2025

In the short but terrible time that we thought TikTok was gone, Stassi had some big realizations?like maybe high-stress situations aren?t her thing. Thankfully, TikTok survived, and now she?s joined by hysterical TikTok star Max Balegde! They spill royal tea, laugh about Max?s sweaty hands debacle, and swap stories about Disney conspiracy theories. From Samuel L. Jackson?s unrecorded interview to Max?s rise from viral videos to international TV, this episode is packed with hilarious moments and UK vibes. All thanks to the app that almost wasn?t!

This episode is sponsored by: OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com and use code STASSI for 15% off any product. Thrive Causemetics - Get an exclusive 20% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/STASSI. Progressive - Find insurance options within your budget at Progressive.com . Chime - Learn more at chime.com/Stassi . Hiya - Receive 50% off your first order at hiyahealth.com/STASSI. 

01:22:54 1/22/2025

Stassi and Beau share their deeply personal story of navigating the Los Angeles wildfires, where everything changed in an instant. As they struggled to manage their fear and panic?Stassi showing hers outwardly, Beau trying to stay calm?they worked together to prepare their kids and make the emotional decision to evacuate their beloved home before winds kicked back up this week.

They reflect on how losing a home, whether you?re a celebrity or not, is about so much more than walls?it?s about memories, safety, and love. They are both consumed with thoughts of those who have lost absolutely everything they have worked hard to build. It's unimaginable. If you feel inclined to donate, at the end of the episode, they share some organizations supporting wildfire victims that are making a big difference.

This episode is sponsored by: OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com and use code STASSI for 15% off any product. Thrive Causemetics - Get an exclusive 20% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/STASSI. Progressive - Find insurance options within your budget at Progressive.com . Thrive Market - Head to ThriveMarket.com/stassi to get 30% off your first order, plus FREE $60 gift. Nutrafol - Get $10 off and free shipping at Nutrafol.com with code STASSI. Caraway - Visit Carawayhome.com/STASSI10 for an additional 10% off your next purchase or use code Stassi10 at checkout.

01:22:38 1/17/2025

Stassi and C-O-Lo are kicking off 2025 with some major New Year's energy! After a long break with her kids, she?s feeling emotional about Hartford growing up?especially now that her daughter lives in her Elphaba outfit and has her contemplating a Frozen-meets-Wicked birthday party mashup. Stassi is on a mission to find her word of the year, taking inspo from Meghan Markle?s resilience, and spilling on how she?s tackling social anxiety as part of her New Year's goals.  Plus, she?s narrowing down her signature scent and embracing her forever love for Castlecore (she was into it before it was trendy). New year, new magic, and all the energy focused on manifesting positivity!

This episode is sponsored by: Lume -Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code Stassi at Lumepodcast.com/Stassi ! #lumepod. OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com and use code STASSI for 15% off any product. RO - Go to RO.CO/STASSI to see if your insurance covers GLP-1s?for free. Hiya - Receive 50% off your first order at hiyahealth.com/STASSI. Our Place - Go to fromourplace.com and enter my code STASSI at checkout to receive 10% off sitewide. Progressive - Visit Progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance.
 

01:14:18 1/8/2025

Stassi and her bestie Taylor Strecker are diving into holiday laughs and festive fun in this special Christmas Day episode. They kick things off dreaming up Jesus? signature cocktail (espresso martini or Prosecco?) and laughing about Stassi?s idea for a gallery-worthy painting of Jesus with his drink of choice?sorry, Beau! TikTok panic is real as Stassi preps for its possible farewell, and Taylor spills the tea on hosting Anna Delvey at her holiday party. From cheetah-print ornaments to Santa Barbara Christmas plans and toddler-level Santa logistics, it?s holiday magic, laughs, and plenty of inappropriate gifts. Cheers!

This episode is sponsored by: Nutrafol - Receive $10 off your first month?s subscription and free shipping. Go to Nutrafol.com use promo code STASSI. Lightbox Jewelry - Shop lab-grown diamonds at lightboxjewelry.com and get 10% off your first order with code STASSI10.

01:06:50 12/25/2024

Stassi and C-O-Lo are bringing the holiday cheer and a side of awkwardness in this festive episode! Stassi dives into her deep discomfort with opening gifts in front of people (can we normalize private gift-opening, please?) and shares her hilarious white elephant story, complete with sneaky gift-hiding. They chat about the lost art of thank-you cards, go-to holiday gift ideas, and the magic of Elf on the Shelf. Plus, Stassi vents about Beau hijacking her perfectly curated wrapping aesthetic, and they swap stories about revealing the big secret about Santa. It?s all things holiday, with laughs, relatable rants, and plenty of sparkle!

This episode is sponsored by:Quince - Go to Quince.com/stassi for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Hiya- Receive 50% off your first order at hiyahealth.com/STASSI. Ro - Go to RO.CO/STASSI to find out if you?re covered for free. OUAI - Go to THEOUAI.com for 15% off sitewide and enter promo code STASSI.

01:09:41 12/18/2024

Stassi?s back, and this time, Beau joins her for what?s basically a podcast date night. They kick things off with Stassi?s mysterious chin pain and dreams of a Mommy Makeover before diving into a hilarious game of questions. From social media icks like caption cringe and overused filters to conspiracies about secret celebrity tunnels with elite Starbucks, nothing?s off-limits. Stassi debates how she?d prove she?s from the future (witch or leader vibes?), and Beau dreams of a 1960s sports car while Stassi plans to splurge on Versailles antiques. It?s all fun, laughs, and a lot to talk about with these two!

This episode is sponsored by: Lume - Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code Stassi at Lumepodcast.com/Stassi! #lumepod. Better Help - This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/STASSI and get on your way to being your best self. Chime - Open your account in 2 minutes at chime.com/STASSI . Thrive Causemetics - Get an exclusive 20% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/STASSI. Our Place - Go to fromourplace.com and enter my code STASSI at checkout to receive 10% off sitewide.

01:12:47 12/11/2024

Stassi kicks off December with her BFF Taylor Strecker for a hilarious chat that covers everything from Christmas chaos to internet trolls. Stassi shares her dream of escaping LA?s holiday monotony, and the duo swaps parenting stories, like Messer?s energy overload to Hartford tattling on bounce house kids, and Stassi hilariously ?tells on herself? as a self-proclaimed narc They dive into celebrity gossip, including Taylor?s viral Page Six moments, and dish on beauty trends like preventative facelifts. Add yin-yang twin dynamics, Stassi's awkward Moana premiere moment, and a little Lindsey Lohan glow-up admiration?it?s holiday overload!

This episode is sponsored by: Lightbox Jewelry - New customers get 10% off their first order on lightboxjewelry.com using the code STASSI10. Hiya- Receive 50% off your first order at hiyahealth.com/STASSI. Nutrafol - Recieve $10 off any order! Enjoy free shipping when you subscribe. Go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code STRAIGHTUPGIFT. Dreamland Baby - Go to dreamlandbabyco.com and use my code STASSI for the BUY ONE GET ONE FREE. Caraway - Visit Carawayhome.com/STASSI10 to take advantage of this limited-time offer for up to 20% off your next purchase. Thrive Market - Go to ThriveMarket.com/stassi for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift!

01:11:15 12/4/2024

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